“Grief is in two parts. The first is loss. The second is the remaking of life.” - Anne Roiphe
The oppressive heat of summer had lifted, leaving the afternoon much cooler than it had been in months. As a creature who had thick fur, it certainly made Cait’s rounds about Westside more enjoyable. Veiled to appear as nothing more than a common, albeit large, black cat, he neared the end of his circuit. All he needed to do was cut through the park, the shortest path between his current position and the Arcade-O-Rama. Today, however, there was a problem. Namely dogs that were currently occupying said park. He had good reason to be skittish about dogs. He really did, and it didn’t all center around the fact that he was a cat. Most dogs simply could tell that he wasn’t just a normal cat, which apparently constituted as some sort of threat. As such, he was often met with hostility. He debated taking a longer route home, because there was a group of them gathered around a park bench. They crowded around an older woman with bright red hair.
She pulled back her hair as she listened to the low howls, growls and whines from the canines, then grumbled something that caused the pack of them to disperse. Cait hesitated, making sure the dogs had shuffled off and wouldn’t be in his path, before entering the park. He watched the woman as he passed by the bench. There was something odd about the woman. She was different than the humans she had met. He slowed his pace as he regarded the woman curiously, circling around so he came just in front and to the side of her.
She leaned forward and smiled. "Tis a wee bit unusual tae see one of yer kind here, lad."
So that was why she seemed different. She’d seen right through his veil, which meant she had some kind of talent. He approached and sat directly in front of the woman. There was no point in maintaining the disguise, so he simply shifted back to his true form. The violet striped markings formed across his black fur, his mouth growing much too wide for a normal cat.
“It’s unusual to see someone who can see past my veil."
“Ah have some experience in these matters. Fear not. Ah bear nae ill will towards sidhe in general.”
He didn’t reply right away. It was the first time he had been recognized as being of faerie origin. He replied mildly, "Good. It would make for a very awkward interaction."
The woman sniffed the air, and her next words surprised him even more: “Ye bae of Irusan's clutter, ah ken.”
His tail flicked once, a little comfortable that he knew more about him that he did about her. "He has many children," he stated, neither confirming nor denying the fact. "It is unusual that you are familiar with Irusan."
“Ah di have some experience in these matters, or did, some time ago. And longer since ah visited yer father's court.”
Cait regarded her in quiet suspicion for several moments. And then it dawned on him just who he was speaking with. There weren’t many humans who travelled to Faerie. There were even fewer that had visited the “court” of King Irusan of the Cheshire cats. In fact, he could only recall one visiting: a mage that was both feared and respected among the Sidhe.
"Now it makes sense."
“Aye?
"Of course. Only one human, that I'm aware of, has visited my father's so-caleld court." She had many names among the denizens of Faerie, and not all of those names were flattering. So opted to go with the less insulting of her names. "I never reckoned I would actually come across the Lifebringer while here in the city."
The woman closed her book and chuckled. "Been a long time since ah bae called that."
"I imagine so. Humans, at least the ones I've met, are not prone to addressing people with titles like that."
“What brings ye tae the city, lad. Yer a long way from home, and there bae iron everywhere here
Cait Sith's tail twitched slightly. "Yes. Far too much iron."
“Did ye lose a wager?
He immediately thought of his litter mates, Tim and Tom. Both were prone to making bets, though they certainly weren’t the only ones in his family who indulged in that kind of behavior. "Unlike some of my siblings, I'm not prone to making wagers unless I'm sure of the results."
“Seems like that wuid take the fun out of it.”
"Perhaps, but finding myself stuck with the results of a wager lost is even less fun."
The woman nodded, then steered back toward her original line of questioning. “Yer still a long way from the realms.”
"That I am. It's been a learning experience spending the few years with humans,” the cat answered, again avoiding a direct answer.
She set her book aside entirely, setting it in the satchel at her side. “Ye bae a scholar then?”
"I think that might be a stretch. Settling curiosity is more like it."
“How like ye. Is it settling, yer curiosity?”
"I am what I am. And humans are just... odd, contradictory at times, and never cease to surprise me." He tilted his head, ears perking up as his answer elicited a laughter.
The woman lifted a finger to her lips in an effort to stifle herself. “And what surprises ye the most, wee traveler?”
"Where to even start... " He grinned that all too toothy cheshire grin of his. "It's almost maddening at times."
"Ah cannae imagine" she said, a faint smile still on her lips. “Ah 'ave been introduced tae a matter of some curiosity, maeselv.”
"Is that so?"
The Lifebringer stood and slung her satchel over her shoulder. "Aye, a matter of some importance, left festering tae long.”
The cat’s head canted to the side as his curiosity was piqued yet again. "Is it...I believe the human phrase would be 'is it an itch that needs to be scratched'? "
"We shuid bae so lucky,” she replied as she walked away. "More like a chancre or boil, ah ken."
Before he realized it, he found himself falling into step beside her. "Sounds fairly serious."
“Ah dinnae ken. That pack reckons. The humans, they dinnae even notice.”
"The pack... the dogs?"
“Aye. Did ye know what ogres call a gruip of dogs?”
"My dealings with ogres are... limited, at best."
“Lucky lad... they call them a ‘serving.’ Di ye ken what they call a group of cats?”
"No, I'm afraid not."
“An ‘appetizer.’ Not particular about what they eat, those ogres.”
"So what is it that the ‘servings’ are saying about the ogres?"
“Oh, the pack told mae about something, else....”
The redhaired mage stopped walking and turns to face an old brownstone apartment building. The sun seems a little lower in the sky and the architecture different from the neighborhood they were just in. Cait paused as his senses picked up on something beyond just the building design that set it apart from the others nearby. His fur at the back of his neck prickled up as he picked up on a malevolent aura about it.
”What di yea know about demons and grief, lad?”
"Grief... is not something I've dealt with personally. And demons I have some knowledge of, but would not be considered an expert on the matter."
"Ivy," the woman said as she walked up to the building to touch the plant growing along the walls. "What di ye know about talking with ivy?"
"I've never had occasion to speak with ivy.” He didn’t add that he had absolutely no talent in nature magic that would allow him to converse with plants.
"It takes patience. Ivy lives a long time."
He watched as the woman sunk her hands deep into the leaves. He left her to converse with the plant while he made use of his senses, both the feline variety and the magical kind, to get a further feel for the building. “And the tale it tells?”
“Loss... nae one who live here has ever raised a child tae adulthood. Couples, long married sit and stair at each other wondering what cuid have been. Dreams. This building has nae dreams. They've all burned out.”
He shook his head after a moment or two. Whatever had a hold of the building and its inhabitants was unnatural. Magic. "Grief is palpable... I can smell it... feel it."
“They don't even ken. They think it bae the way of things." She let go of the ivy. "Well lad, curiosity perked?"
"... yes." He regarded the building with narrowed eyes. "This place needs to be dealt with, so it will no longer affect the unsuspecting."
“And how wuid ye like tae proceed then, lad?
Cait considered the matter for a moment, then he started sniffing about the building. "Scouting first. To see what can be seen."
He prowled toward the front entrance, but nothing stood out as particularly dangerous. He could see that it led into a foyer. There were wards or any of the sort that he could detect. The Cheshire cat continued his inspection, checking the perimeter of the building, jumping up to look in windows on the first floor. What he saw reflected what he felt. Loss. Grief. Sadness. That is until he came across one apartment in particular. While the others in the building looked burned out, the girl within was perky, chipper even. He observed her for a moment or two, then returned to the mage’s side.
"There's a girl in one of the apartments. Different from the rest. It looks, feels like the grief that surrounds this place has not touched her. I could not make out any dangers immediately. That's not to say that there aren't any within."
“The front door, haps?” He followed as she walked up to the entry to the foyer. She tugged at the door a few times, muttered something, then it opened. “Unlocked. Where di ye see this girl?”
"To the right, third apartment."
The pair approached the apartment door. The woman frowned as she walked up to the door, while Cait cautiously sniffed at its edge. He looked up to see the mage tug at a leather strap in her hair, letting her red tresses fall across her face. In a moment, the lines around her eyes and the wrinkles in her cheeks faded. Her body firmed and lost some of its roundness. She was changing her appearance, making herself look younger than she actually was, and the cat took that as a cue. The purple markings faded away, his body shrinking, taking on the awkward proportions of an adolescent cat. The Lifebringer opened her arms, inviting kitten sized Cait into them. He mewed in thanks before leaping up. There was a moment of awkwardness as the woman snuggled him, then attributed it to part of the act she was about to put on. She adjusted her hold on him and knocked on the door.
It didn’t take long for a perky young blonde to open the door, an ear bud hanging around her neck. "Hmmm... hello?"
When the woman responded, her thick accent was absent. “"Hiiii. I'm Gretchen from the Millennium City Animal Shelter. We're going door to door to raise awareness about the organization and introduce a few of our wonderful pets.”
Cait played up the part of cute kitten as the woman rubbed under his chin. An involuntary purr rumbled up out of him, and he let out the softest, faintest, cutest meow he could muster as he locked eyes with the blonde.
“Uh... I don't know if they allow pets in this building.”
“Awww, we checked with the landlord. You look like a cat person, and little Tommy here needs a good home. He has all his shots, and when he gets old enough, we'll neuter him for free.”
His tail twitched in agitation. Like hell that’s gonna happen. He vocalized his thoughts with a loud, insistent sounding meow.
“Uuhhhhhh.”
“Can we come in? We can talk about it a bit more,” the woman asked, her pitch going up just a little.
“I don't think so. Look, it's been nice talking to you.”
The young woman started to close the door, and they were about to lose their opportunity to find out what was going on. Cait took the initiative, wriggling free of the mage's arms to make a break for the door. “No! Wait! Tommy!”
Just as he was about to skirt through the narrow opening, all of his whiskers lit up with sensation, as if he were about to hit a wall. He came to a screeching halt just before hitting the gap in the doorway. What was that? A ward? The blonde bent down and scooped him up. He mewed loudly, making a show of rubbing against the girl’s neck, purring in feigned affection. His attentions were on the apartment though, his eyes fixed on it.
“Awww.... aren't you cute together. I think he likes you. Look... can I leave him with you for just a little bit. I've been with him all day and I really need a smoke. I will just step outside… ”
The young girl looked puzzled for a moment, but after smiling weakly to the kitten, she nodded. She closed the door, and Cait watched as the mage walked back toward the entrance way. He felt a tingle, like static electricity, pass along his fur as he was carried in over the threshold. Definitely a ward. He wasn’t sure what sort of ward was in place. He needed to investigate, which meant the girl would have to put him down. He locked eyes with her, letting out a questioning meow.
"Aren't you a little cutie patootie?" Suddenly, the girl pinched him by the scruff of his neck, holding kitten sized Cait right in front of her face. “I did need a little snack.”
The girl’s jaw unhinged into a grotesque maw. Cait swayed awkwardly as she lifted him higher, dangling him above. It was at that moment that he realized the mage had essentially used him as bait. He’d have to reckon with that later, since he was about to be eaten. Despite being in a cute kitten form, the cute act dropped immediately.
"I'm afraid you'll be going hungry." He gestured with all four paws, sending a concussive blast of arcane energy point blank at the demon. He found himself going airborne as the demon flung him away. He twisted in the air, then just like any other cat, he landed on all fours. His claws dug into the floor to keep from sliding, his body growing and shifting back into its true form. He looked at his handiwork, and saw that the blast had disintegrated the woman’s jaw. Strips of flesh had torn away from her face, revealing something black and unholy beneath.
A foul stench rose in the room as the thing hissed. “Bad kitty.”
Cait’s mouth twisted into a creepy, tooth filled grin. “What, you don’t like it when your food fights back?”
The girl’s limbs uncoiled into long, tentacle like appendages. The creature breathed out a noxious cloud of gas, assaulting his keen sense of smell. “Isn't there someone you will miss if you never see them again? Are you in this world all alone little spirit?”
His hackles raise as he shifts again, growing into the size of a panther, though still bearing that Cheshire cat grin and markings. At first, the barb didn’t land… and then his mind drifted to the azeztulite pendant that the wendigo destroyed. He was cut off from home. He was trapped in the human world, and the closest thing he had to a family now was the Progeny. But would they miss him if he was gone? Would they notice? Would they care?
“I am not alone,” he answered...but it came out sounding more like he was trying to convince himself of that fact.
The demon stalked closer to the large cat, making an obscene gesture of licking its ravaged lips, appearing to grow larger the closer it came. "Poor, kitty.... your lies. They are delicious."
Feeling trapped and cornered, he reacted as any animal would. He let out a yowling, hostile growl. “It is not a lie! I'm not alone!"
The demon grew just a tiny bit larger. “Left here to die by that .... awww... was she a friend?”
His ears lay flat against his head, the fangs in his terribly wide mouth bared in an almost unholy looking snarl. It was at odds with the fact that inwardly, he seemed to shrink in on himself. The woman was not his friend. A friend wouldn’t have used him as bait like this. “She is the Lifebringer... she is not my friend."
He thought of Sid, Olevia, and Oliver, of the people he had come to know since joining the Progeny. Unlike so many other people in his life, none of them had used him. He wasn’t a pawn in some over-arcing game. He paused, for a moment seeming to regain a little bit of his confidence.
"My friends...my true friends would not abandon me."
“But they aren't even here.”
That’s right. They aren’t here. It’s just me. He snarled and swatted out with one of his massive paws as the demon drew too close. “Stay BACK..." he snapped, lashing out.
“Sooo goood. Sadness, grief from a- ,” the creature laughed. “Hero? You're no hero.”
Cait nearly jumped out of his skin as his back hit the wall beneath the apartment window. The demon’s words wounded him far more than he’d anticipated. But...it was the truth.. wasn’t it? What was it he’d told Sid? He helped people because it was satisfying, not for some altruistic sense of morals or a drive to uphold the law. So… what exactly did that make him? If not a hero, then what?
"...you are right. I am no hero." A growl rumbled low in his throat. It didn’t matter if he was a hero. Because there were no heroes in the apartment. It was just Cait, and the abomination that plagued the inhabitants of the brownstone building.
"But I am here all the same. And you should not be." Without much in the way of warning, his front paws slam down onto the floor, casting a spell in desperation. If he could just get it out of the apartment, beyond the threshold, hopefully the Lifebringer would be nearby… and hopefully ready to assist.
The spell sent out a wave of concussive force that should’ve blasted the demon right through the door. Instead, the cat looked on in horror as the creature staggered, its tentacles slithering out around parts of the room to maintain its balance. It grew yet again, seeming to feed on Cait’s desperation and anger.
“So delicious.... I think I might keep you... with my other pets.” Its limbs began to slither toward the cat, trying to grab his paws and immobilize him.
His fight or flight instinct demanded action, even if it was blind action. He swatted out at the limbs trying to close in on him, lashing out with fang and claw. Cait roared as a tentacle latched around one leg and sank his fangs into it. The demon shook the tentacle in a bid to free itself, but the cat wouldn’t let loose. More limbs began to appear, all snaking out now to ensnare him. Panicked, knowing that if he couldn’t get away, he shifted suddenly to his normal size. Now free, he darted away, relying on the added speed and agility he had at this size to keep ahead of the tentacles. The demon let out a howling laugh as it toyed with the cat, flicking its limbs here and there to keep him moving. He nimbly dodged as best he could, but he couldn’t keep it up forever. He began to tire, his reaction time slowing, fueling a fresh surge of panic. The limbs seemed to grow, filling the room until there simply was no place to run to. They finally entangled him. The howling laugh continued even as he fought with tooth and claw to get free. Through the gnarled mess of black limbs, the cat saw its face twist up into the wicked turn of a grotesque smile.
“My new pet.”
Cait twisted and struggled once he saw the face. He wanted no part of what this creature intended for him. In the midst of all this, something just outside the window caught his attention. A raven tapped at the glass, and held in its beak was a note. He strained and twisted to get a better look.
Invite me in.
It was then he understood the nature of the ward he’d encountered at the apartment’s threshold. It prevented entry unless invited inside. It was why he felt like he was about to hit a wall when he tried to dash inside before. It was why he was able to enter only when the demon in disguise had picked him up. It explained why the Lifebringer had been insistent about being invited in. It wasn’t just for the sake of investigation. It was because she knew about the nature of the ward to start with. He now saw a way he could come out of this fight alive.
His words tumbled out in one desperate rush. "Lifebringer, please come in!"
The raven disappeared from sight, and barely a moment later, the outside walls of the room ripped away. Ivy twined and sunk into the brick, creating a two meter round hole. The Lifebringer stepped into the room, kilt swishing about her legs, her wrinkles of age and gray streaks in her hair returned. The demon pulled back, still maintaining its grip on Cait as it turned its attention to the new arrive, somewhat unsure.
“Hey cat! What do you have when a kitten wins a dog show?”
The feline struggled in the demon’s grasp. “I don’t know!” he cried out incredulously.
“A CAT-HAS-TROPHY!” the mage replied with a chuckle.
The cat’s panic was quickly replaced by exasperation. You’re making jokes? At a time like this!? He wriggled, and he swore he felt the limbs start to shrink ever so slightly.
“Hey Cat! What type of dogs does Dracula have?”
The tentacles about him loosened just enough that he was able to break free. He landed on all fours, answering as he bounded over to the woman. "Let me guess. Bloodhounds?"
“You're getting the hang of this,” she laughed. The limbs pulled back slowly, as if the she was toxic. “What do you get when you cross a race dog with a bumble bee?”
He quickly darted to stand just slightly behind her. "I don't know. What?"
“A greyhound buzz.” She laughed louder, and the tentacles pulled back even more. She smiled at Cait. “Ye need tae get into the spirit, lad."
The Cheshire cat understood now. The laughter was hurting the creature. “Alright. What do you call a pile of kittens?"
"Ah dinnae ken."
"A meowtain."
That elicited a guffaw. “What do you call a large dog that meditates?”
"I have no idea."
“An aWare Wolf.” The woman held up her thumb and forefinger. “A wee bit of a stretch with that one?"
Cait was not one to just burst in the fits of laughter, but he couldn’t help himself. He pictured Razira, the werewolf from the Protectors, in a ridiculous meditative pose, and the laugh just sort of escaped. It wasn’t loud, or boisterous, but the fact he laughed out loud in the first place was impressive.
“You got to be kitten me. That was a good joke.” The pun was answered with a bark of laughter.
Ivy crept into the room as the pair exchanged jokes and puns, catching the limbs and entangling them. The demon shrank further and further, becoming less and less human. It struggled furtively against the grasping ivy as it became smaller and smaller.
“What do you call a cold puppy?”
"What -do- you call a cold puppy?”
The mage started giggling before she could even get the answer out. “A chilli dog.”
"What do you get when you cross a chick with an alley cat?"
“Wait, ah ken this one...nae... it escapes me.”
Cait lifted his chin smugly. "A peeping tom."
The woman broke into a full throated laugh. She peered over to where the creature lay entangled in vines. It had shrunk to the point that its dark limbs were scarcely visible. Cait prowled just out
"Surely you have more jokes, Lifebringer."
“Aye but they may naet bae appropriate for such wee ears. Di ye reckon the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms?”
He shook his head. "I do not. What's the difference?"
“One's a Goodyear. The other bae a great year. An American told mae that joke.”
With the last joke told, the mage walked over to the pile of ivy, fishing out a wee black mass of squiggly limbs. She held it up to her face. “Yer all bum and parsley, ah ken.”
Cait approached cautiously to inspect the little demon as she held it out for him to look. He tiled his head as he regarded it. "... hard to imagine that such a tiny thing could cause so much damage. It's so...puny now."
“Grief demon.” She glanced about their surroundings. “Something much have attracted it here. Ye cannae fight grief with bluster. It feeds on fear and desperation. Ye fight grief with time, an laughter.” She popped the tiny thing into her mouth, chewed a few times, and swallowed. She made a face at the taste. “Bitter.”
“You could have disposed of it by other means,” he commented, a little disgusted.
The ivy began to retreat, replacing the bricks in the wall one by one. “Aye. Now, let’s have a look at ye.”
Cait remained still as the woman checked him over. He was only a little roughed up and relatively unhurt. “Ye dinnae seem the worse fer the wear. Ah reckoned ye know more animal jokes, though.”
"A few more, yes."
She stepped back once she was done checking him out. "Ye did fine lad. She had ye there for a moment, nay?"
He tried to brush it off, mildly replying, "Apparently so."
The truth was that the demon had laid open emotional vulnerabilities he didn’t know he had. He could stand there and deny all day, claim that it was just ideas planted by the creature. But the fact of the matter was that it could only exploit what was there to start with. So he could either ignore what happened. Or he could accept it. He chose to accept it.
He realized now that the pendant had been a crutch all along. He could fall back on it if he didn’t like what he experienced in the human world. With it gone, now he had every reason to embrace what this world had to offer. He might be the only Cheshire cat in the human world. But he didn’t have to be alone. He had friends, friends who were far truer to him than any of his blood relations had ever been.
As he parted ways with the Lifebringer and made his way back to the Arcade, his steps felt lighter. For the first time since the wendigo fight, he didn’t feel restless or trapped. Instead, it felt as though there were nothing but bright new possibilities before him.
